Is he clever or all four year-old do it?

We do not have any other four year-old to compare to but as parents, we always think our children are better than others. 

As usual, Alex the Gannet has been searching around for snack. I gave him a pack of chocolate biscuit in the box. Normally, I would pour the contents into a bowl. This time I decided to let him try eating from the box. The opening was a bit small and I know he would struggle. I just let things be.

A moment later, I heard him running to the kitchen and searching for something. I went to the kitchen and saw .........

Alex trying to pour the content into a bowl ...... what a clever boy!

So, is he clever or just like any four year-old? Either way, I am ecstatic!

Eeyore at home.

We have a donkey at home and his name is Alex. Every time we say "No" or "Wait", Alex will make this sound "Hee Haw ... Hee Haw". We can't help but laugh.  

School holidays is driving us mad especially me. Feel really bad when I put him in front of the television. We go out as much as we could but I am running out of places to take him. Everything cost money and it's hard to justify spending any. 

Food prices are getting higher despite the supermarkets "lowering" their prices. Things that we normally buy don't go down as we eat lots of fresh cooked food. I could see reductions in ready meals, canned food or supermarket own brand items but they are not the things that we eat or buy.

Two weeks to Autumn term and will be celebrating when Alex goes back to school.

Be prepared.

I have been doing a lot of thinking about Alex's future. How my son can learn to be independent, self sufficient and be a responsible person. I found the answer ... or least for now.

I want him to join the Scouts when he is old enough but wasn't sure if the scouts would accept children with ASD. Deep down, I know Alex will learn life skills, make friends and many more if they do accept him. I decided to find out more.

I googled for "Scouts for Autistic" and surprised to find an article by the Scouting magazine from America and other Scouts organisation websites. I read the article and yes, my instinct hasn't failed me.

This article confirmed everything I believe, http://www.scoutingmagazine.org/issues/0609/a-boys.html and I decided to write an email to the Scouts in my area to find out if they will accept Alex when he turns six.

30 minutes later, I had an email from the Scouts and it read:

Hi Christine,

I need to know a bit more before I can assist you.

I need to know what area you are from as there are many Scout Groups around, some do take special needs children and others don't, this can be for a very wide variety of reasons ( see below for an idea ) that would need to be considered / taken into account when your son is old enough to join at six years old.

To give you an idea of reasons mentioned above.
Size of Beaver Colony ( how many members ).
Number of leaders / adults.
How many other special needs children already in the Colony.
Leaders views and expertise in working with special needs children.
Past experience with special needs children.
Your sons specific special needs.

The list would probably go on but don't let this put you off.

Could you please let me know the following and I can work from there

Sons name
Date of birth
Address inc postcode
School ( intended )

Hope this helps.

I replied with all the details required plus a little bit more about Alex being high functioning.

When I checked my email this morning, a reply in my Inbox almost brought tears to my eyes, tears of joy and appreciation.

Yes! Alex will be accepted if we decide to go ahead. I spoke to Jeremy when he came back this morning and I replied with our decision.

As it's not well publicised that the Scouts accepts children with special needs, many parents are not aware of this. It would be good for children with Special Needs to participate in mainstream activities and have a balance in their life.

Parents are often afraid that their children will be excluded in mainstream activities, hence they put their children in special camps for special needs. I am not saying it's a bad thing but children have to learn to adapt in real society and learning young would be an advantage.

We are not always there to hold their hands. Sometimes they fall, they have to learn to stand up and keep going.

The Messenger in making.

Alex is not always a "pain in the butt". He is one extremely helpful boy and a clever one too.

I took him to Sainsburys yesterday for weekly shopping and he was very good all the way till the end until he saw the checkout. I had to turn into one last aisle by the checkout for air fresheners and this boy is like "a dog with a bone", he just won't stop .... going on and on about getting into the car.

Anyway, we got home. I unloaded the shopping bags from the car and left them in the hallway when Alex decided to help me take them to the kitchen. He dragged them (very heavy) along the hall and into the kitchen. He gave me the sweetest smile when I said thank you.

He helped me unpacked and then put them away into places he can reach. Not much later, I heard him in the bathroom upstairs and I went to check what the commotion's about.

My boy looked at me and smiled, he said "Ma ma" and pointed at the counter. He put his Dad's shaving gel he found in the shopping bags next to the old one.

What a smart boy!

This morning, while Jeremy's in the toilet doing .... his No.2. He shouted "I can't find a pencil .... I want to do my Sudoku". I was still in bed and called for Alex. "Take this to Daddy" giving him a pencil. He took the pencil to his Dad in the toilet.

Yeah ... looks like I have a little slave now - he he he

A Gannet at home.

Alex has been eating non-stop and I wonder what next.

The weather is not getting any better and I ran out of outdoor places to take him. I don't really want to take him to indoor playgrounds because of his fear of noise, echo and my fear of him getting something from other kids.

He is very much home bound these few days and he eats because he is bored. He still watch Bob the Builder and he still comes to me (what seemed like every 5 minutes) for snacks. It's one thing after the other and I am getting weaker by the minute.

He still goes to bed at six-ish and wakes at 5:00 in the morning. And this time, he wants me to be awake too. I am totally lacked of sleep. I have no will to live ..... ha ha ha

I just hope school starts tomorrow!

Friends of EarlyBird

I set up a group for families who have attended the NAS EarlyBird Programme about two months ago. We meet on Fridays every two weeks.

Last Friday, we had a great turn out, a new family joined us for the first time. Cara* and her husband Brian* and their three sons, all autistic. (as I am not familiar with them, I have changed their names to protect their privacy).

You would think that having one autistic child is bad enough but with three? I totally admire them as a couple and a family unit. Their first born who share my son's name is on the other end of the spectrum. I would not say that he is severely autistic but then again, observing him for about 45 minutes, I could gather that he is hard work.

Alex is a 5 1/2 years old, non-verbal child that can only sign "more" for everything. He has a tendency to run away without notice and his parents had to be very very aware of his whereabouts. He has no eye contact and when I tried to talk to him, he shrugged away and back to his own world.

Their second son, was recently diagnosed with ASD and he is on the mild end of the spectrum. Both Cara and Brian thought that their second born was neuro typical until six months ago, he was assessed and diagnosed. I didn't manage to get much information from Cara as she was busy going after Alex and I doubt she had anytime to herself.

Their youngest is 24 months and they suspect that he is on the spectrum too. He is very very much hard work and the temper tantrum is .... well, I must say that, his parents are Saints.

Looking at Cara and Brian work as a unit makes one admire their courage and patience.

I told Jeremy about them when I got home and I could feel the tears rolling down my cheek. We are so lucky that our Alex is so loving and cheeky .... always receiving hugs and making us laugh. I cannot bear to think what it feels like to have three children, in their own world and not even a hug when you are at the lowest.

Cara and Brian is a true example of what a family or a couple should be. They work together despite all the bad things thrown at them. They still manage a smile and a laugh in the very short time we were together. I hope I will see them again.

He is getting increasingly frustrated.

Alex was trying very hard to speak this morning. He wanted to say bye bye da da car. What came out was "Bye bye dada ...." and repeat the whole thing again for several time. I could tell that he wanted to say bye bye da da car but when he try to make a sentence, he stuttered. Towards the end, he was in tears out of frustration and still no complete sentence.

Watching him getting frustrated made me sad but I know that this is progress. It shows that he wanted to talk and that he wanted it to be perfect.

Both Jeremy and I asked him to calm down and speak slowly by breaking down the sentence into three parts. To Alex, breaking it into three part is not a sentence and he continued to try and still couldn't get it right.

He is also getting very teary lately .... especially when we say "no" to him. His expression changes from a smile to a frown and tears in split second. It would be easier to give in to his every demand but I know better. If I allow this, he will know that he can use tears to get what he wanted and our lives would not be worth living (sigh).

Is there a funny side to this?

We are back!

You may have guessed that I've been away. We took Alex to Warwick Castle and Drayton Manor over a four-day weekend. All I can say is ..... you could never ask for a better child than Alex. He was so good and considering that he is a child with ASD, he certainly cope well with changes.

We stayed in three different places, two hotels and a night at our friends home in Newport. Ate in very noisy restaurants, lots of walking and driving.

Everything went wrong from the beginning of our holiday starting with Jeremy making a mistake with his hospital appointment. When we planned the holiday, he said that his appointment was at 9am. So, we decided to leave for Warwick Castle right after his visit to the hospital. The night before, he said he made a mistake and it was 11:30am.

On Friday morning, at 10:45am, he said "Oh God ... my appointment is at 11am." We had to rush out the door and luckily, we made it in time for his appointment. Then, we realised we forgot to take Alex's letter from his doctor to get an exit pass at Drayton Manor. By the time we got everything sorted, it was already 1pm. I felt like killing someone as it was so stressful.

We realised that all our holidays starts with stress and then we needed another holiday to get over the first one. Thankfully, we all enjoyed this one.

We got home on Monday night and Alex went straight to bed after his shower, both Jeremy and I hit the bed straight after.

Tuesday morning, laundry ..... what joy! Wouldn't it be nice that we don't have to do all these after a holiday?

In the evening, I went to my friend Gaynor's Charity Curry Night in aid of National Autistic Society at another friend's restaurant. I helped her arrange this with the restaurant and she did the rest. Jeremy did not come with me as he had to babysit Alex.

Alex said "Goodnight" to me before I left and when I got home, he was fast asleep and looked like a cherub. I walked in at midnight and Jeremy was waiting for me, reading in bed.

Jeremy asked how my night was and I told him that I enjoyed it very much. We raised quite a bit of money and he said that he was very proud of me for helping Gaynor.

It was nothing, really. I was just helping a friend who is doing this for good cause. Gaynor gave up smoking at the beginning of the year and then train everyday to prepare for a 10 days trek across the Sahara.

So, in comparison, organising a curry night is just ......

Anyway, Alex came to me first thing in the morning. Gave me a big hug and kiss as if he hasn't seen me in years.

I like that feeling and may consider doing it more often.

Warwick Castle - Day 1 (what's left of it)

Alex ... posing (I wished) it was just pure luck I captured this

Beautiful castle and we loved it. It would be even better if we packed a hamper for a picnic.

The main attraction for the castle this season. A trebuchet.

You can see what I meant by pure luck if we need a proper photo of Alex. As soon as he sees the camera, he'll say "Cheese" and looked away or run away. I long for the days where he smiled to the camera with his loveliest smile.

Day 2 & 3 (Newport)

Stayed at Tammy and Simon's home for a night and then went to the Canal (about 15 minutes) for a walk. Left at about 1pm for Tamworth.

We had a great time with Tammy and Simon. Drank wine and chat while Alex slept upstairs.

Day 4 (Thomas Land, Drayton Manor)

Although Alex had an exit pass, we used it only on one or two rides and queued for the rest. When the staff saw us queue, they came to us to let us know that we can just show up at the exit and I told them that we are aware of that but we want Alex to learn to queue.

It was a good day out and Alex loved it.